A message to someone Drowning
Author: Sh. Hamed ibn Abdullah Al-Ali
Question:
I would like to let you know that I have committed most major sins and I am not
saying this in order to take pride in my sins; I used to feel this before but
not any longer. I have drunk wine twice in my life or perhaps three times, I
don't know. I have committed adultery with almost 10 women and I was about to
destroy the future of a girl but Allah saved her from my harm; I do not know is
it possible that Allah repents on me and forgives me? I don't know, I have tried
to repent more than once and every time I return to the same sins to the degree
that I have felt I am a hypocrite who is not afraid of death and being
accounted. Sometimes I feel that Allah loves me and that I love Him, but then
Satan quickly takes over my heart again.
I have defeated Satan in many rounds, but he defeated me in more battles; Is it
possible for me to return to Allah once again and how?
I have prayed a lot but more than that I have interrupted my prayers. My
weakness has reached points a believer cannot imagine.
I have sworn upon the Holy Quran that I will stop smoking but I haven't.
I have promised Allah Himself that I will not view pornographic sites and that I
will never visit them again and that I will not watch those unclean movies that
the west uses to kill our faith but I have broken my promise to Allah; My will
has weakened to a level that nobody can imagine after I used to have strength in
performance and the ability to change my personality and my way of life;
I have become a person who does not feel the pleasure of life even though I
still maintain my soul and my rounds of vice, sins, lying, cheating; so how do I
get rescued?
I want to know what religious people have known but what
I haven't. I am sure that they know something I don't know and don't feel, so
why? This is me so what do I do to benefit me, may Allah benefit you.
Answer:
In the name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful. All praise be to Allah, and
prayers and greetings upon our prophet Muhammad and his family and companions.
The prophet (PBUH) said Allah will repent upon whoever repents before the sun
rises from the west [reported by Muslim from the hadith of Abu Hurairah]
I have read your message, and I know that nothing prevents you from repenting,
even if your sins reach the sky or fill the whole earth. As long as the human is
in this life, the door of repentance is open. I have noted from your letter that
you are living a battle between the call of faith in your heart, and the call of
desire that is guided by Satan in your heart
Praise be to Allah the Exalted who has retained in your heart some of the light
of faith, which blames you for sins, and beautified good deeds to you.
But this light is weak, because the darkness of sins, which are the blowings of
Satan, has weakened this light. This is why it sometimes shines, making your
conscience awake a little, only to extinguish again and you return to committing
sins.
I will clarify to you the illness that you are suffering from, then I will
describe the treatment, so please read this with reflection and interest, may
Allah benefit you from it.
Dear brother, the heart is the place of will in the human; sometimes it wants
good, and sometimes evil, and the body parts are nothing but soldiers that obey
the heart according to what it desires.
The difference between religious people and yourself is that the hearts of the
former firmly want good, so their body parts obey this will and are thus
persistent in obeying Allah the Exalted. As for yourself, your heart knows good
and evil, and differentiates between good and bad deeds, but it cannot want
good, so you find that it wants desires even though it knows they will harm it,
so it commands the body parts so they obey it, but what is the reason?.
The reason is that the hearts that are immune to Satan easily want to do good
because these hearts are healthy and strong. On the other hand, in hearts that
Satan can enter and wonder in freely, Satan can easily achieve making the heart
want sins, after he has made them look attractive to the heart, because the
latter is ill and full of satanic germs.
For some people, Satan only briefly enters their hearts owing to the
strong immunity surrounding them. For example, those who commit minor sins then
quickly repent from them, and those are the ones about whom Allah (SWT) has said
(interpretation of the meaning): {The pious ones, when a visitation from Satan
afflicts them they become mindful, then lo! they see.}.
There are some people whom Satan never comes close to their hearts, as they are
like the sky, which is guarded from devils by flames; likewise their hearts are
guarded from devils.
The Prophet (PBUH) has said about this heart white like a smooth rock not harmed
by temptation as long as the heavens and earth exist [reported by Muslim from
the hadith of Huzaifah (RAA)]. Satan has entered the hearts of other people and
has dwelled there and created a nest for himself in which he lays his eggs and
hatches them. So he has controlled these hearts, commanding them to do forbidden
desires, so their hearts want these desires and command their body parts to
commit them and they indeed do that. This is because Satan has found hearts that
have no immunity, their doors open, weak and ill owing to committing sins, and
this is why Allah the Exalted has said about this type (interpretation of the
meaning) {Satan has gained the mastery over them, so he has made them forget the
remembrance of Allah}.
Because the zikr (remembrance) of Allah is immunity from Satan, Satan has made
them forget it in order to control and drive their hearts, which their body
parts will then follow.
The heart is not immunized from Satan except with the zikr of Allah the Exalted,
and it does not have the strength to want good except by doing good deeds.
Satan does not defeat the heart unless it is inattentive of the zikr of
Allah the Exalted and weak because of committing sins and vice.
And now, after you have known the reason why your heart does not obey you in
wanting to do good and avoid sins, and cannot preserve its righteousness, the
treatment is in the following medical prescription. Take it and maintain it as
its results are guaranteed -Allah willing - if you persevere it honestly:
1. Maintain the five prayers in
congregation, especially the fajr prayer and never miss it. Allah the
Exalted says {and the fajr reading, for the fajr reading is witnessed} i.e. the
fajr prayer is witnessed by angels.
2. After the fajr prayer remain in the
mosque to read the Quran until sunrise, and then offer 2 rakas 10 minutes after
sunrise.
3. Say subhan Allah wa bi hamdih (may Allah
be glorified and praised) one hundred times a day at any time in the mosque or
house, whether walking, sitting, in the car, etc. This zikr wipes out sins.
4. Ask forgiveness of Allah one hundred
times each day, saying astaghfirullah wa atoobu ilayh (I ask forgiveness of
Allah and I repent to Him), once again at any time you wish and in whatever
condition you are in.
5. Say this zikr: la ilaha illa Allahu
wahdahu la sharika lah, lahulmulku wa lahulhamdu wa howa ala kul shayin qadeer
(there is no god but Allah; He has no partner; He has the possession and praise,
and He is capable of everything) one hundred times each day at any time you wish
and in whatever condition you are in. It doesn't necessarily have to be said in
the mosque. The prophet (PBUH) maintained these zikrs, as they are the life of
the heart and its indispensable nutrition.
6. Between Maghrib and Ishaa remain in the
mosque and do not leave it, and recite as much as you can of the Quran while
concentrating
7. You should totally avoid watching TV and
reading magazines, and going to places where there is vice, as you are in
quarantine in order to restore health to your heart, and the medicine (good
deeds) will not benefit you if you induce disease (sins) into your heart during
the treatment period.
8. Continue this program for at least a
month: living with the Quran reciting it with consideration, and acting upon
what is in it; spending time alone for long hours for the zikr of Allah the
Exalted. The proof of doing this for a month is that the prophet (PBUH) ordered
that by saying "Recite the Quran in a month, in 25 days, in 10 days, in 7
days" [Bukhari & Muslim from the hadith of Ibn Omar].
9. If the environment in which you live does
not support you in applying this program then change this environment: abandon
bad friends, and avoid places in which you spend your free time if they
encourage you to commit sins, and if you can travel to Makkah for example to
follow this program then do it.
10. Donate part of your money as a form of repentance to
Allah the Exalted, as secret charities are seen only by Allah the Exalted. In
the authentic hadith "Secret charities extinguish the anger of the
Lord" [narrated by ibn Hibban from the hadith of Anas].
11. Try to perform umrah with the intention of renewing
your faith and cleansing your past with the water of this blessed trip. The
prophet (PBUH) said A umrah causes forgiving of sins since the previous umrah,
and an accepted hajj has no reward other than paradise [Bukhari & Muslim
from the hadith of Abu Hurairah (RAA)].
12. If you owe anything to others return everything, and
do not retain anything you will be accounted for, as a form of repentance to
Allah.
13. Ask Allah every night during the sahar (prior to
fajr) with this supplication Rabbi inni zalamtu nafsi zulman kathiran wa la
yaghfir uzunuba illa Ant, faghfir lee maghfiratan min indik warhamni, inaka Anta
Alghafoor Urraheem (My Lord, I have oppressed myself a lot and only You forgive
sins, so forgive me a forgiveness from You and have mercy upon me, You are Most
Forgiving, Most Merciful), and also Allahuma alhimni rushdi wa qini shar nafsi(O
Allah, grant me my the right way and protect me from the evil of myself), as the
prophet (PBUH) taught these two to some of his companions.
In addition, perform a lot of istighfar and supplication, as the sahar is a time
of acceptance of supplication.
This is your prescription, and one month is not necessarily the period required,
as change might appear on you before that, or you might need more than a month
in this quarantine. The goal is to expel Satan from the heart and clean his
traces and dirt and the filth that he has placed there, as this is the reason
behind the weakness of your heart and its incapability of wanting good and doing
good deeds, and its quickness to follow desires.
So if health returns to your heart and you become fit and strong when it comes
to the zikr of Allah the Exalted, immune from the cunningness of Satan, then you
may slightly reduce this program to the extent that you can withstand, as the
prophet (PBUH) said "You should do what you can withstand" [Bukhari
& Muslim from the hadith of Aisha (RAA)], unless you can withstand more than
this, for in this case you should increase doing good as long as your heart
loves good deeds.
These faithful duties are the levels as considered by Allah: the more a servant
does, s/he ascends in the levels of piety. The best things to perform are what
Allah has prescribed upon you (obligatory forms of worship). You will notice
that things have changed in a surprising manner, as long as you maintain the
prescription I have given you, and you will find yourself hating to commit sins
and your heart not wanting them, looking at them with inferiority and disdain.
You will also like good deeds and feel enthusiastic about them, and feel their
good taste in your heart. The secret behind this change is that you have treated
you heart with the zikr of Allah the Exalted and good deeds until your heart has
become healthy wanting good and loving it after it was ill, wanting evil and
sins and loving them. Allah, the Truth and
Exalted says (interpretation of the meaning) {but Allah has endeared the faith
to you and has made it seemly in your hearts, and He has made hateful to you
unbelief and transgression and disobedience; those are the followers of the
right way).
By grace from Allah and as a favor; and Allah is Most Knowing, Most Wise} and
Allah knows best
Sh. Hamed ibn Abdullah Al-Ali, who loves good for You.
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Asalam O'Alikum wr wb...........
God bless all muslims, Aameen.