"And Allah has made for you in your homes a place of
rest..."[An-Nahl:80]
This
may seem like an unusual question and your automatic response may be "Why,
of course my home is an Islamic Home!! My family is Muslim and that makes our
home a Muslim one!!"
Go
through this short
checklist
to determine if your response should really be in the affirmative.
There
are several ahadeeth that highlight the importance of choosing a righteous and
pious spouse. The wisdom of this is obvious: a pious spouse is more likely to
bring happiness and contentment to the other spouse and the couple together will
be more able to build a righteous family and home life. This is the foundation
of the home.
This
begins with each spouse fulfilling the duties and responsibilities of their
roles and treating each other with kindness and compassion. It then goes beyond
this to include guidance in other spiritual matters such as striving to
strengthen imaan; paying attention to worship and correcting it when needed;
encouraging the reading of Qur'an, praying at night, giving charity, and reading
books on Islam; helping to choose pious friends; enjoining goodness and
forbidding evil. Emaan is something that may increase or decrease so it is
necessary to continually focus on increasing our own and that of our spouse.
Remembrance
can be in many forms: with the heart, with the tongue, through prayer,
recitation of Qur'an, memorizing adhkaar and using them, discussing Islamic
issues, or reading Islamic material.
These
are things that should occur on a consistent basis so that the angels will come
to the home and bring Allah's blessings. The Prophet, sallallahu alayhe wasallam,
said: "The
example of a home in which Allah is remembered and the example of a home in
which Allah is not remembered, is like comparing the living and the dead." (Muslim).
This
means that salah is established within the home at its required time and that
members of the family pray in congregation when several are present. The family
may also designate a specific area for prayer and maintain its uniqueness and
cleanliness.
For
women, it is better to pray each prayer within the home. For men, it is
recommended to pray voluntary prayers at home after having prayed obligatory
prayers in the masjid. The Prophet, sallallahu alayhe wasallam, said: "The
voluntary prayer in the home is better than the voluntary prayer with the
people. It is like the obligatory prayer of the man in congregation being better
than praying the obligatory by himself."
(Sahih
al-Jaami).
This is to ensure that homes are made places of worship just as the masajids.
The
Messenger of Allah, sallallahu alayhe wasallam, said: "Recite
Surat Al-Baqarah in your houses, for the Satan does not enter a house in which
Surat Al-Baqarah is recited."
(Sahih al-Jaami).
He
also said: "When
you go to your bed, recite Ayatul Kursi: 'Allah! There is no god but Him, the
Ever-Living, the One Who Sustains and Protects all that exists', to the end, for
then there will remain over you a guardian from Allah, and Satan will not come
near you until morning."
(Bukhari).
This
is primarily the responsibility of the head of die household who must ensure
that he is guiding his family to the correct path, enjoining them to do good,
and forbidding them from evil. Attaining knowledge is incumbent upon all members
of the family and is the basis upon which Emaan will flourish, A study circle
should be established in the home that covers the various areas in Islam and
from which all family members will benefit. Children should especially be
encouraged to participate since this will establish a pattern for them that will
be carried throughout their lifetimes.
This
may include such things as books, cassette tapes, and CDs. It is important to
choose accurate and reliable material that will benefit the members of the
family. There should be a variety of materials to cover all age levels and
language needs of those in the home. Arabic material is definitely a must since
everyone in the family should either know or be learning to read the language of
the Qur'an. Books should cover a variety of topics, be properly organized, and
be easily accessible. Audiotapes and CDs may include Qur'an recitation,
lectures, khutbahs, tapes for children containing supplications, reminders of
Islamic manners, and nasheeds (religious songs with no musical instruments).
Family members should encourage one another to use these materials on a regular
basis, and should be shared with other Muslim families who may be in need of
them.
The
Prophet, sallallahu alayhe wa sallam, said; "When
Allah wills some good towards the people of a household. He introduces kindness
among them."
(Ahmad, Sahih al-Jaami).
He
also said: "Allah
loves kindness and rewards it in such a way the He does not reward for harshness
or for anything else."
(Muslim).
There
are many examples of the Prophet's kindness and good treatment toward his family
that we should try to emulate. He was affectionate and playful with his wives
and children and would help with household chores to case the burden for his
wives. Following his example will bring tranquility to the home and help to
truly make it an abode of rest.
Such
as guarding the secrets of the home, seeking permission to enter, not looking
into other people's homes, not allowing children to enter the parent's bedroom
during certain times of the day, and not staying alone overnight. This last one
is interesting to consider since some husbands travel for their business or
work. The Prophet, sallallahu alayhi wasallam, actually discouraged this. Ibn
Umar reported that the Prophet forbade being alone and said that a man should
not stay overnight alone or travel alone (Ahmad). Not only will he be alone, but
his wife and children are likely to be left alone in the home without any
protection or companionship.
"My
Lord! Forgive me, and my parents, and him who enters my home as a believer, and
all the believing men and women."
[71:28].
Righteous
people who enter your home will bring many benefits due to their presence and
conversations with them. They are more likely to discuss useful topics and may
be excellent sources of information and knowledge. We should always make du'aa
that Allah will bless us with righteous friends since they can have such
positive effects on us. The
Prophet, sallallahu alayhe wasallam, said: "Keep company with a believer
only, and let your food be eaten only by the righteous." (Abu Dawud,
Tirmithi).
Television
and unlawful music are not allowed in the house; pictures on the wall do not
contain animate beings; there are no statues or anything that resembles statues;
dogs are not present in the house; smoking is not allowed; decorations are kept
simple to avoid excessiveness; the telephone is used for beneficial purposes and
not harmful ones (such as gossiping or backbiting); when people come to visit,
the men and women sit separately. The effects of these evils on the sanctity of
the home should be obvious. For example, the Prophet,
sallallahu alayhe wa sallam, said: "Angels do not enter a house which
has either a dog or a picture in it." (Bukhari).
It
is best for the home to be close to a mosque so that it will be easier for men
to attend the prayers in congregation and for all family members to visit the
mosque for lectures, study groups, and social gatherings. It is also advisable
to find an area where other Muslims live to obtain the benefits of community.
One should definitely be careful about close neighbors and avoid those who are
obviously immoral. When choosing a house, consideration should be made regarding
the availability of separate sitting areas for men and women. The house should
be spacious and fulfil safety and health requirements. The WC in the toilet
shouldnot be in the direction of “the Qibla”.