Istikhara and Divine Guidance:

Istikhara and Divine Guidance: how one’s prayer of seeking guidance is answered

Question: I was wondering about istikhara. 6 years ago my family took out an istikhara to see whether I should get engaged to an individual. We all got positive signs, and my fiance and I have been engaged for the last 6 years. Over the years, if I had ever felt any type of confusion about my decision, I would take an istikhara out and have still always receieved positive feedback.
Now that both of us are finishing up school, we were going to start planning the wedding. However, a few months ago, my fiance took a turn and is now claiming confusion about whether he wants to get married at all, ever. So we took istikhara''s out again and still receieved positive. I asked him to take one out and he said he would. My question is, what happens if my findings are positive, but his are negative, how do we come to an agreement? Also, since Istikhara is divine guidance, shouldn''t we follow the guidance that we have been receiving over the last 6 years, regardless of anything else? I have strong faith that InshAllah the insecurites that he is facing will vanish, and so I am compelled to stick with this engagement. I am just unsure about whether that is the right step to take or not. Please assist me...

Answer:

Walaikum assalam wa rahmatullah,

Istikhara means ‘seeking the good.’ The istikhara prayer is a prayer through which one seeks Allah to guide one, through the outplaying of destiny as it unfolds, towards that which is best.

That which is best may not be best in the way we imagine it: many seemingly negative manners have great worldly or next-worldly benefits.

See attached answer(s).

Wassalam, Faraz Rabbani (faraz@sunnipath.com ; hanafi@sunnipath.com)

Sunni Path - www.sunnipath.com

How is One’s Istikhara (prayer of seeking guidance) answered?

Istikhara (prayer of seeking guidance) gives the best answer, for one's worldly and religious life (not worldly life alone), when coupled with another essential sunna (tradition of prophet Muhammad): istishara (seeking sound counsel) of those worthy of being consulted and taking the sound means of assessing the situation at hand.

This is why it is good to consult with people of wisdom, understanding, and experience regarding the results of one's prayer of seeking guidance (istikhara), because one's own interpretation is often clouded by one's inclinations and desires.

Guidance about the Guidance Prayer (Istikhara)

The proper manners of istikhara (the prayer of seeking guidance) include suspending one’s preferences and consigning one’s affairs to Allah, seeking His guidance towards what is best for one.

The istikhara (guidance) prayer is a gift from Allah to direct our affairs towards success and baraka (blessing).

It is also a lesson in developing one’s trust in Allah and one’s sense of need of Allah, to become of those who, “depend on guidance from their Lord. These are the successful.” [Qur’an, 2.5] It is a means to realize that, “My success is only through Allah.” [Qur’an, 11.88]

This realization, that it is Allah Most High alone who gives and takes, and that nothing in creation moves or is at rest except through the Will and Power of Allah, is the essence of true, living faith.

The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “Say, ‘There is no ability nor power except through Allah,’ (la hawla wa la quwwata illa billah) because it is a treasure of the treasures of the Garden.” [Bukhari, Muslim, Abu Dawud, Tirmidhi, Nasa’i, and Ibn Maja] The scholars say that one who truly realizes the meanings of this is already in the Garden of spiritual meanings, rejoicing in the Pleasure of Allah.

It is recommended to repeat the istikhara up to seven times (or even more).

Istikhara: The Guidance Prayer

When one is not clear about the result of the istikhara, the fuqaha mention that it is recommend to repeat it, upto 7 times if necessary (usually done on separate occassions). [cf: Radd al-Muhtar]

It is not necessary that you get a dream or even a "feeling." Rather, the istikhara is a prayer that Allah guide you towards that which is best (khayr) for you. If you do the prayer of guidance (istikhara) with the proper manners, the most important of which is to truly consign the matter to Allah and suspend your own inclinations, then Allah will make events unfold in the direction that is the best for your worldly and next-worldly affairs.

In general, when it is not possible to perform the istikhara prayer itself (such as when one is out on the road, or in one's menstrual period), it is recommended to simply read the dua itself. [Radd al-Muhtar]

The istikhara prayer may be made for a specific matter or be made for a general seeking of all that is best. Some scholars, including Imam Abd al-Wahhab al-Sha`rani and Ibn `Arafah before him saw this kind of istikhara prayer as being superior. Others, including Shaykh Ibn al-Arabi, recommended performing a general istikhara prayer for all that is good every day, ideally at the time of the Duha prayer (after sunrise).

Imam al-Nawawi mentioned that before the istikhara prayer, one should seek advice (istishara) from those whose knowledge, wisdom, and concern one is confident. Ibn Hajar al-Haytami and others mentioned that one of the benefits of this is to further distance oneself from the desires of one's own egotistic inclinations.

It is recommended to open the dua of istikhara [below], with praise of Allah and sending blessings on the Prophet (Allah bless him & give him peace), and to close it in this manner, too.

Like other duas, it is recommended that one face the qibla.

It is disliked to 'hasten' in seeking the answer to one's istikhara, like other duas, because the Prophet (Allah bless him & give him peace) said, "Your prayers are answered, unless you hasten, saying, 'I prayed, but no answer came.'"

One should be pleased with what Allah chooses for one, and not seek to follow one's whims after the answer to one's supplication becomes clear.

According to a traditional report transmitted on the authority of Muhammad ibn al-Munkadir, it was Jabir ibn 'Abdi'llah (may Allah be well pleased with him and with his father) who said:

"Allah's Messenger (Allah bless him and give him peace) used to teach us how to seek guidance in choosing the best option available in a practical enterprise [al-istikhara fi 'l-amr], just as he would sometimes teach us a Chapter [Sura] from the Qur'an. :

"'If one of you is concerned about some practical undertaking, or about making plans for a journey, he should perform two cycles of ritual prayer [rak'atain], not as an obligatory observance [farida], but voluntarily. After the prayer/salah is over, he should say (this is the actual supplication for Istikhara):

'"O Allah, I ask You to show me what is best, through Your knowledge, and I ask You to empower me, through Your power, and I beg You to grant me Your tremendous favor, for You have power, while I am without power, and You have knowledge, while I am without knowledge, and You are the One who knows all things invisible.

Allahumma inni astakhiru-ka bi-'ilmi-ka wa astaqdiru-ka bi-qudrati-ka wa as'alu-ka min fadli-ka 'l-'azim fa-inna-ka taqdiru wa la aqdiru wa ta'lamu wa la a'lamu wa Anta 'Allamu 'l-ghuyub :

O Allah, if You know that this (you can be specific here) undertaking is in the best interests of my religion, my life in this world, and my life in the Hereafter, and can yield successful results in both the short term and the long term, then make it possible for me and make it easy for me, and then bless me in it.

Allahumma in kunta ta'lamu anna hadha 'l-amra khairun li fi dini wa dunyaya wa akhirati wa 'aqibati amri wa 'ajili-hi wa ajili-h :fa-'qdir-hu li wa yassir-hu li thumma barik li fi-h :

If not, then turn it away from me, and make it easy for me to do well, wherever I may happen to be, and make me content with Your verdict, O Most Merciful of the merciful.'"

wa illa fa-'srif-hu 'an-ni wa yassir liya 'l-khaira haithu kana ma kuntu wa raddi-ni bi-qada'i-ka ya Arhama 'r-rahimin :

You can also visit http://islam.about.com/blistikhara.htm for the Istikhara.